AWESOME LOST 1967 INTRO!

My "brother from another mother...and father" friend from Georgia, Ryan "Kindercore founder, Owl Scooter salesman" Lewis and his real brothers created this incredible LOST intro for a contest that took place at Comicon. But, they missed the deadline by one day, and are now just showcasing their talent on the internets. (They're desperate and need constant attention, so humor them, won't you?)

Hopefully for posting this on my blog and giving him a whopping 3 more hits, he'll finally get around to printing up that Foxymoron collection...yes? :P

THIS IS WHAT WE'RE REDUCED TO AS A NATION...

Republican leaders in Washington, refusing to say "yes or no" on the question of, "Is Obama an American born citizen?!" They won't say it, and instead toss out the "We'll see..." response because the only people left that they can count on are the Glenn Beck's of the world. The paranoid, scared-to-death lunatics that make up the base of their party right now.



This is the kind of thing that just makes you shake your head in disgust, and wonder how we've managed to get this far gone. When exactly did the type of shit that usually ends up in my spam folder on my email account, make it into the realm of "rational" political discussion? There are Representatives right now, trying to pass legislation directed at "Proving the President of the United States has a birth certificate." Lord help us all.

MATT GROENING AT COMICON

Local TV writer for The Star, Aaron Barnhart recently caught up with Matt Groening at the Bongo Comics booth (the dude makes multiple millions of dollars a year and just causally hangs out at the booth until the crowds start swarming and he goes to hide out where NO ONE cares to visit...like Artist Alley or those by idiots who still make mini-comics. He also shows up for APE in SF every year!) and conducted a brief interview.

(The visuals might make you sea-sick...he was originally only going to use the audio from the clip, until Groening asked about the Flip HD camera he was using.)



Seriously. Matt Groening is super fucking nice and genuine. It's always a blast to see people you admire turn out to be a class act in person!

HOW A NERD SPENDS HIS SATURDAY AFTERNOON WHILE HE SHOULD BE RINGING UP CUSTOMERS...

I can't help it. As much as I miss going to San Diego for the comicon, it's not being a part of the Lost panel that reeeeeeeeeeally kills me. Luckily, there was a live-blog of the whole thing. (A few spoilers...for those of you who don't like awesome things like that.)

FOR THE RECORD...

...if I am about to be arrested for the crime of being in my own home, you can make damn sure I'm not going to quietly go, "That's cool officer. Please escort me downtown so I can spend the night in jail until you get this all sorted out, thanks!" I'm going to be too busy being pissed off and screaming out, "ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?! THIS IS MY OWN HOUSE! HOW THE FUCK CAN I BE "BREAKING INTO" MY OWN GOD DAMN HOUSE?!"

And for all these conservative bloggers and commentators who have spent the past year (if not their entire lives) rallying against "the government" for "infringing on our rights" to be taking the side of the cops on this issue...it's just another reason why these people have zero credibility left. Zero. Nada. Zip.

The only thing that pisses me off more than their hypocrisy is the fact that Obama started to backtrack once the "controversy" became plastered all over 24-7 news networks and the internets.

He was right the first time. The cops who arrested a man for being in his own home were stupid. Plain and simple.

FOR ALL THE TALK OF OBAMA AND HIS "TELEPROMPTER..."

You'd think they'd realize that maybe it's not the smartest thing to write your speeches completely on your own. I mean, my editors at The Pitch give me suggestions and offer corrections before any of my comics actually see print. Does that make me an elitist? No, it just helps to make me look like less of a dumbass.

Vanity Fair helps Palin out with her Resignation Speech.

SERIOUSLY...SOMEONE GET GLENN BECK SOME HELP...

He just keeps getting crazier. This is easily the most insane I've ever seen this dumbass...

A CALLER DAMN NEAR MAKES GLENN BECK'S HEAD EXPLODE

God, I could listen to this all day long. They start arguing from the get-go, but the REAL fun begins around the 3:00 mark. Enjoy!

WHEN CONSERVATIVES LITERALLY HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT (PART TWO)

Another week, another nonsensical bullshit "scandal" cooked up by the Drudge Report. Usually, the fact that it carries itself as a "news site" but obviously leans right doesn't bother me, (As I tend to immediately jump over to Huffington Post right after, and they obviously lean left.) What gets under my skin and makes my blood boil is the way he's so god damn desperate to get talk radio and the blogosphere fired up, (which then the national news media follows suit, covering the story of the how "everyone" is talking about this!) by purely manufacturing bullshit into some sort of scandal.

The latest issue was making the rounds (and email attachments) pretty good this past week was OBAMA CHECKING OUT THIS 16 YEAR OLD'S ASS!!!

And sure, the photo looks pretty funny, so a lot of people tossed the photo around. But leave it to Drudge to give it an off-color headline, (The Prez has got a boner, get it!) and leave it at the top of his website ALL DAY LONG!



But see, if you actually watch the video of the photo shoot, (they were lining up at the G8 Summit) you'll see how Obama was really looking down at the steps, because he was getting ready to help a woman step down to his level.

But you know what, so what. What if he WAS checking out a woman's ass? Would that seriously contend with the rest of what was going on that day in the news? I mean, I'm sure Obama is the first and only President to have ever had done such a thing...oh, wait, Clinton was a total horn-ball! I'm sure we have thousands of photos out there of him checking out chick's asses. Fucking Liberals. They just always have sex on the brain. But not George W. Bush! That man was a born-again Christian, a family man, a...



Hmmm...well, I'm sure the video is something completely different...and not a volleyball player bending over, waiting for him to slap her ass...



Well, shit.

*****

The other piece of bullshit that Drudge help set ablaze this week was the photo of Obama's 11 year old daughter, Malia, wearing a peace symbol t-shirt while her Daddy was in Italy for the G8 Summit.



The Conservative website Free Republic's comment section exploded with all sorts of racist fueled hate speech, including...

"Poor kids. I hope they're not 'punished with a baby', hopefully they won't deal cocaine like the Kenyan."

"DIRTBAGS! All of them. Our [White House] is now a joke to the rest of the world. We have no respect and this is not going to turn out well, mark my words. We will be hit, and much worse than last time. We are now seen as weak and vulnerable. Ghetto and Chicago thugs have taken over."

"They make me sick .... The whole family... mammy, pappy, the free loadin' mammy-in-law, the misguided chillin', and especially 'lil cuz... This is not the America I want representin' my peeps,"

"Could you imagine what world leaders must be thinking seeing this kind of street trash and that we paid for this kind of street ghetto trash to go over there?"

Now, I'm confused...weren't these the same people crying and calling for David Letterman's head on a platter for making jokes about Sarah Palin's kid? And what's with all the "Ghetto" shit? Does she have a giant clock hanging around her neck? Is there a solid gold grill in her mouth that I'm just not seeing in ANY of the photos of her visit?!

Bill Maher said it best a couple of weeks ago when that elderly Nazi nutbag shot the African American at the Holocaust Museum, "Not all Republicans are racist, but if you're racist, chances are you're a Republican."

I'll leave you with this bit of wisdom from Fox & Friends...



...quit marrying "other species," you freaks!