To celebrate the 15th anniversary of Bill Hicks' death, David Letterman is going to air the 6 minute "censored" bit for the first time ever. TONIGHT!!! (Fun fact, Bill Hicks was only the second person ever to be censored inside the Ed Sullivan Theater...the first was a man named Elvis Presley?!)

The great Aaron Barnhart does a nice write-up on his blog, but for those of you who have no idea who Bill Hicks was or why his bit was canceled, lemme tell you, you're going to want this tonight. Trust me.

He deals with homosexuality, the way it's "gross" that two men want to kiss but "hott" when two women do it. "You know, I consider myself an open-minded person. But speaking of homosexuality, something has come to my attention that has shocked even me, Have you heard about these new grade school books for children they're trying to add to the curriculum, to help children understand the gay lifestyle. One's called Heather's Two Mommies and the other is called Daddy's New Roommate. Folks, I gotta draw the line here and say this is absolutely disgusting. It is grotesque, and it is pure evil. (pause) I'm talking, of course, about Daddy's New Roommate...Heather's Two Mommies is quite fetching!"

He flat out attacks pro-lifers, "You know what bugs me about them? If you're so pro-life, do me a favor - don't lock arms and block medical clinics. If you're so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries. I want to see pro-lifers with crowbars at funerals opening caskets - "get out!" Then I'd be really impressed by their mission."

And my absolute favorite bit he ever did, the Easter Bunny...

"I've been traveling a lot lately. I was over in Australia during Easter. It was interesting to note that they celebrate Easter the same way as we do - commemorating the death and resurrection of Jesus by telling our children a giant bunny rabbit left chocolate eggs in the night. I wonder why we're so messed up as a race? You know, I've read the Bible - can't find the words "bunny" or "chocolate" in the whole book. Where do we get this stuff from? And why those two things? Why not "goldfish left Lincoln logs in our sock drawers"? I mean, as long as we are making things up, why not go hog wild?"

The man was soooooooo ahead of his time, and I can't wait to actually see him perform this on Letterman tonight, 15 years after he left us.

I love how he baits the audience into clapping for the "Schools including the homosexual books" bit. Some people online are claiming that Bill himself was against homosexuals, but those people have obviously never heard his routine...


Some of the awesomeness that's coming out (next) this month...

Noby Noby Boy (PSN)

Flower (PSN)

Resident Evil 5 (PS3)

LocoRoco 2 (PSP)

Willie Nelson & Asleep At The Wheel (CD)

Emmylou Harris * I've Always Needed You (CD)
(sure, this cover looks lame as hell, but her voice is out of this world.)

M. Ward * Hold Time (CD)

Dark Was The Night (CD)
(this is an incredible line-up of artists doing new songs and covers to celebrate World Aids Day!)

Beirut * March of the Zapotec (CD)
(shhhhh...I already have this CD since I'm reviewing it for INK, but you should go out and buy it too!)

Glitter & Gold: Words & Music By Barry Mann & Cynthia Weil (CD)
(a collection of hits from this amazing husband and wife songwriting duo from the 60's and 70's)

War Child presents: Heroes (CD)
(another amazing collection of covers, this time benefiting children of war)



Yeah, yeah. I know there are really important matters going on in the world and whining about an award show is like one step up from complaining about the weather...but whatever. I like to bitch and moan and you obviously are bored enough to keep reading...


The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

An absolute disgrace. First off, the Weinstein Brothers can go fuck themselves with buying off the Academy. It started the year Shakespeare In Love beat out Saving Private Ryan and continues to piss me off to this very day. The Reader was awful. Completely distant, a "twist" that would make even M. Night Shyamalan go, "Really?!" Just a lame movie that deals with the Holocaust and therefore is soooooo much more important than say Wall*E or The Dark Knight. Ricky Gervais wasn't far off when he told Kate Winslet that she'd win an Oscar for doing a WWII film.

Frost/Nixon was underwhelming as well. And listen, I LOVE politics, but this film was flat out boring at times. I expected to be on the edge of my seat, watching these two important figures battle to the end...but most of the movie was focused on the behind-the-scenes bullshit. They blow right through the first 3 tapings, and by the time the fourth and final one hits the screen, it just feels like they rushed to get us there.

Both of those films could have been knocked off the list and made way for Doubt, Wall*E, The Dark Knight, a whole bunch of better and riskier films. But my money is on MILK. Even though I loved Slumdog, MILK will stand a test of time. It was remarkable and would be a sign that the academy isn't full of old cronies afterall.


WALL-E - "Down to Earth"
Slumdog Millionaire - "Jai Ho"
Slumdog Millionaire - "O Saya"

First off, why only three choices?! This has ALWAYS been five in the past. In fact THREE of them last year were from that piece of shit Enchanted. And secondly, screw whomever came up with the idea that if a song isn't simply on the soundtrack, it's not eligible. That's the bullshit reason why Springsteen got chopped off. He liked his "The Wrestler" song so much, he's going to put it on his new album. (which comes out next Tuesday) But it's not like it was a song that he had sitting around for a decade or anything. He wrote it as a personal favor for his friend, Mickey Rourke. It was a brand new, original song for The Wrestler. If his album came out months from now, this wouldn't even have been an issue. Which is why it's bullshit. Let's hope if any of these three win, they NEVER include that song on any sort of "Greatest Hits" package or anything...



In that I make comics for the local newspaper, which someone sees and cuts out to send to someone else, and that person does a blog post about it...

(cue Elton John's "Circle of Life")

It seems Terry and Oliver Holler are driving a DeLorean across all 50 states in hopes of raising money for Parkinson's research. A friend of theirs saw my Foxymoron strip dealing with me being sad that it's already 2009 and I still don't have a hoverboard and mailed it to them. Then they posted it on their blog, (and emailed me first to ask if it was okay, which was very sweet of them!) which totally made my day!

So if you got some extra cash and want to donate to their awesome cause, go right here! And c'mon, their name is TEAM FOX! How much cooler can any of this be?!



Let's not forget that George W. Bush was President ON 9/11, not just somehow responsible after that date. And excuse me, but "keeping us safe" doesn't involve sitting in a classroom while kids read My Pet Goat for 6 1/2 minutes...

Keith Olbermann (back in September of 2007) lays out a nice collection of failures before and after 9/11, and how NO ONE was held responsible or accountable for being wrong and outright lying about the connections between Iraq and 9/11...in fact, most got promoted:

And don't even get me started on Katrina. Here's how badly the Bush Administration fucked up that disaster...watch this clip from Hannity & Colmes, on FOX NEWS, six days after the levees broke. You will see Geraldo Rivera and Shepard Smith pissed off and teary, begging people at home watching to do something! It's the saddest, most honest reporting done during the entire storm:

Listening to the President tonight, watching interviews over the past couple of weeks, it's almost like he thinks we've forgotten all of this shit. Well, sorry sir, we haven't. You're a disgrace to all of us and it's a damn shame you're given the time to attempt to pat yourself on the back.



For the very last time. Let's hope it's half as eventful as his very last press conference...

Has it been 8 years already?! Sigh...



It's been a long EIGHT months, but the best show on television is about to return. Sadly, we still have one week left, but one of the highlights of being addicted to LOST is peeking into various insights of fan's theories and suggestions. And lucky for us, Doc Jensen over at Entertainment Weekly went ahead and began his weekly Lost column today!


Just upload photos of yourself here and enjoy the wacky results!



Before I start, I want to remind you all that I live in Kansas City, and some notable releases such as The Wrestler haven't open here yet. So this list is simply based off movies in 2008 that actually made it to Middle America and that I was lucky enough to see.


I know, it's a Ben Stiller movie. It's a comedy. It's not the type of thing you think of as "Best of the Year" quality, but dammit...it was funny. Robert Downey Jr. gave his best performance of the year in this, (sorry, Iron Man) and both Jack Black and Ben Stiller managed to NOT get on my last damn nerves. (which is rare.) The last scene, with Stiller running towards the helicopter while a small child is stabbing his back...pure awful. Awfully funny, that is.


Again, not a film you're going to see on a ton of "Best of" lists, but a surprising favorite of mine. I expected a "meh" date movie, but completely underestimated Ricky Gervais' amazing charm...even when he's being a total asshole. The love story is fun and believable and Tea Leoni has real chemistry with Gervais. I was kind of surprised it came and went without making much of a dent at the box office. I suppose Ricky's not "leading man" material quite yet, but I imagine the word of mouth after seeing this must have been positive.


A documentary about a French tightrope walker named Philippe Petit who walked between the World Trade Towers. He did it back in 1974, but you'd think he'd done it last week with the energy and excitement he still has talking about it. Truly a feel-good film about just attempting something for the sake of pure enjoyment.


A tough, sober, and intense performance-driven drama about a priest who may or may not have molested a young boy. You get a feeling you know exactly where this film is headed, who's right and wrong, and it forces you to go back and forth. Filled with incredible actors who all bring their A-game, (including a wide-eyed Amy Adams, caught in the middle of fierce battle of certainty.) I also love the way that numerous people I've talked to have variations of what reeeeeeally happened. In the end, the film leaves you with your own sense of doubt.


Danny Boyle has now earned the credibility for me to automatically see whatever his next film might be. The man takes chances, does dark horror, (28 Days Later) and follows it up with a kids film, (Millions.) Now he brings us a Bollywood movie that follows 3 orphans through Mumbai and how that leads to the main character in the hot seat on Hindi version of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" The lil' indy film that could, Slumdog takes you on a journey of love, the ability to change your life, and rising up above your surroundings. It's a heartwarming film, that will leave you smiling (and perhaps dancing along to the end credits.)


A pseudo-documentary, (along the lines of Borat) that follows Bill Maher on his quest to prove that religion is bullshit. At least, the kind of religion that gets people all over the world to start killing one another. (Here's looking at you, Middle East!) Rasied by a Catholic Father and a Jewish Mother, he wondered why Mom never went to church with them, and why one day they simply stopped going to church all together. It's probably my personal favorite film of the year, but based solely as a "movie" it misses the mark in some spots. If you're like me, not sure what you believe but pretty sure that NO ONE has all the answers, you won't find a more entertaining (or enlightening) film this year.


I had no idea who Harvey Milk was. I had no idea that cops used to bust up gay bars like scenes out of the prohibition era. I had no idea of the incredible transformation of San Francisco in the late 60's early 70's in the Castro district. But after seeing this film, Gus Van Sant opened my eyes. Sure, Sean Penn delivers a knockout performance, but it's Van Sant's direction, his use of actual footage and eye for detail, that brings this movie to life. This happened, this is a part of our history. And the saddest part, is that so little has changed over the past 30 years. Watching footage of Anita Bryant rant and rave against homosexuality and how it destroys families and our morals is timeless. Sure, she was arguing against homosexuals getting rights protecting them for being fired simply for being gay, (including teaching in public schools) but the same tired arguments are now being used to reject them from being able to marry one another. Milk was the most important and poignant film of the year.


These next two are just fantastic films that just so happen to be things I was already in love with. Comics and cartoons. The Dark Knight destroyed my expectations of what "comic book" movies could be. This was a film. Period. A classic in cinema that will stand the test of time. From the opening shot, with Joker's goons robbing a bank, then shooting one another in the back, each thinking they're going to be the one actually in on the big haul...Christopher Nolan tosses aside the usual predictable campy notions of what bank heists go like. This is something out of Heat, this feels real, yet somewhat off-putting. And then you have Heath Ledger. Someone forgot to tell him that super hero villains are supposed to be over-the-top and corny. His Joker is destined to become placed aside Hannibal Lecter. If there's any justice, they'll simply give him the Oscar and not even bother getting anyone else's hopes up. This movie made me feel awesome about being a geek.


Ranked above The Dark Knight, simply because I'm a hopeless romantic. WALL*E says it best when it says nothing at all. Who else but Pixar would spend the first 20 minutes of their feature film dialogue-free? On a children's movie, no less. Except this isn't a children's movie. It's powerful enough for anyone and everyone. Young and old, from this side of the planet or the other. Shit, you feel love between two robots for crying out loud! How can you get more timeless than that?! It made me want to go back and watch old silent movies and study how you can get across so much emotion without saying a word. And it's fucking beautiful to look at as well. Makes me glad I gots me a PS3 to enjoy Blu Ray.


A lot of people say it's too long, a lot of people say there's no emotion, a lot of people say it's too similar to Forest Gump, but I say it was a touching reminder that nothing ever lasts. Loosely based of the short story of the same name, David Fincher has created a film that defines the word "subtly." Brad Pitt plays his cards close to his chest, and never lets his emotions pour out. His "Benjamin Button" is one of little words, and more importantly, a sense of "I wasn't even supposed to live this long." Nothing phases him as he takes most of his life in stride...except for Daisy. He first meets her when she's only a child, when he himself is wrinkly old man, (who is actually only a few years older.) Over the next couple of decades, they're unable to connect, but feel something deep between them. A love unlike any other. And when they finally get together, from that scene up above, they're both in their 30's, living in a small apartment, sleeping on a mattress in the middle of the living room...and happier than ever. That scene and one of the very last, with Daisy walking a 2 year old Benjamin along the sidewalk, bending down to kiss him, made me just cry like a baby. Tears of happiness, tears of sadness...just hoping that I too will be able to live a nice full life before the rest of time passes me by.