COLBERT REPORT

Don't forget to watch it tonight. Bitches.

From cnn.com

NEW YORK (AP) -- Stephen Colbert's right. He's always right -- however much logic and common sense say otherwise. And those who disagree with him are wrong.

It's that simple (and funny), as viewers know from Colbert's hilarious commentaries since 1997 as senior correspondent on Comedy Central's "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart."

Now his No-Fact Zone has expanded into a half-hour spinoff, "The Colbert Report." It will air Mondays through Thursdays at 11:30 p.m. EDT, right after "The Daily Show," starting Monday.

And not a moment too soon, figures Colbert (the gifted humorist-performer, that is -- not the make-believe blowhard who shares the same name).

"My character is self-important, poorly informed, well-intentioned but an idiot," Colbert explains. "So we said, 'Let's give him a promotion.' "

Note: The title of the new series should be pronounced with a silent "t" in "report" as well as "Colbert" (say: coal-bear ray-poor), as a verbal handshake exchanged by Colbert cognoscenti. Demonstrating that you get it. That you're one of "the Heroes." Which means you agree with him. Who is always right.