OLD CLIPS FROM DAVID LETTERMAN

I dunno why these sprung to mind tonight, but they're both cherished memories from being a teenager. Both are from 1994, the same year my Mother passed away, and both are extremely funny. (I used to tape things on VHS tapes and go back and watch them over and over again. TV shows, comedy specials, cartoons...it was waaaaaaay before you knew that they'd just turn around and sell this shit to you all over again on DVD.)

This first clips is of Madonna on Letterman. If you haven't ever seen this, you're missing out on one of the best moments in talk show history. She's on for nearly 20 minutes, refusing to leave, cursing like a sailor, making lots and lots of sex jokes, insulting Dave...it's the best thing I ever remember about watching The Late Show.



The next segment is broken up into 2 clips, but man, this interview stuck in my brain for years. I loved how nervous Chris Farley was...how humble and shy and sweaty he was to be sitting next to David Letterman. I love when he slams his hand down on the chair and goes, "I'm on his show!!!" I thought to myself, "I'd do the very same thing if I were ever on there." Right down to telling stories about my family and using lots of self-depricating humor.



This is when the interview gets soooooo good. Him talking about his dad is exactly how my own father was. And the way Farley makes Letterman laugh, almost coughing...so best.

TOP 10 VIDEO GAMES OF 2008!

10. GRAND THEFT AUTO 4 (PS3)

You don't have to be a video game nerd to know all about the Grand Theft Auto series. "It's that game where you kill cops, right?!" Sure is. It's also the poster child for everything wrong with America. Oh, and it's incredibly fun. You can do anything in this game. Run over people, lead the cops on a high speed chase, or, you know, actually play the storyline. It plays out like an episode of The Sopranos with twists and turns, and plenty of dead bodies. Plus, this was the first GTA for the "next gen" systems, so the graphics finally caught up to the point where the characters don't look like they're The Penguin from Batman comics, with their webbed-claw hands.


9. PATAPON (PSP)

Patapon could have easily been the stupidest game of the year. It's a sidescroller where instead of hitting buttons to attack and defend, you perfectly play "beats" as they march to the drums of war. Depending on the pattern you're playing, they'll react accordingly and either attack or hold up their shields. So it's basically a music game disguised as an action platformer. Oh, and did I forget to mention that the Patapons themselves are totally adorable?! I'd follow them into battle any day.


8. GOD OF WAR: CHAINS OF OLYMPUS (PSP)

For a PSP game, this sucker is a beautiful masterpiece. The amount of graphics, speed, intense battles, and awe-inspiring gameplay they managed to pack into a handheld is something to marvel at. This game had been played out on the PS2 before this installment, and Chains of Olympus doesn't feel like a cheap knock-off...instead it competes with the best of what the prior games offered us. If you have a PSP, you owe it to yourself to play this game!


7. BIOSHOCK (PS3)

Already an award-winning masterpiece from the XBOX 360 last year, us PS3 owners finally got a chance to dive into the depths of Rapture and discover what the fuss was all about. Turns out, this game was huge helping of fucking fantastic with a sprinkle of "guilty conscience" decision making on the side. You're asked to kill these "Little Sisters" (or save them) throughout the game, and your choices determine which outcome awaits you. It's the rare treat of a first-person-shooter with a heart and soul. One that begs to be appreciated.


6. PRINCE OF PERSIA (PS3)

If this game hadn't just came out last week, I'd probably rank it much higher. The animations in this game are so fluid, you'll swear you're watching a Japanese anime instead of playing a video game. A simple, yet thrilling adventure of great heights and incredible feats. You'll run along walls, climb up the sides of buildings, perch over railings, and swing amongst polls. All with the help of a woman sidekick that never lets you die...ever. That's the strength of this game. It feels it nice and relaxing and allows you to enjoy the experience, instead of worrying about what's coming up next.


5. ROCK BAND 2 (PS3)

The ultimate party game, hands down. Nothing is awesomer than rocking out with 3 friends to "Livin' On A Prayer!" Which is a blessing and a curse. Playing by yourself isn't nearly as fun (is it ever?!) and since Molly sings while I play drums, our band is usually on hiatus. But Rock Band 2 brings all the fun from the first one, allows you to bring over all your old songs, (and the hundred or so you've downloaded from their weekly updates) and gives you new challenges and skills to keep you busy for at least the next year. (...or at least until Rock Band: The Beatles comes out!!)


4. DEAD SPACE (PS3)

A survival horror title played on an abandoned space ship instead of scary houses or creepy villages. Sounds, okay, I guess. But boy, did I underestimate this game. It's easily the creepiest, most intense, gory, and disgusting game of the year! Sure it rips off 15 different sci-fi movies and the main character never speaks, but the visuals and the sound mixing create an incredibly believable world...that you pray you'll never actually visit. Since the spaceship is entirely made of metal, you'll hear things scrape and bump hundreds of feet away from you. It's an odd thing to get giddy about, but the sound in this game is outstanding! Oh, and the monsters you're fighting are basically the remains of your fellow crew mutated with Aliens. They use the dead bodies as a host and stretch the skin to create horrid images that seriously resemble that of car wreck victims. (which the producers of the game studied to recreate the grotesque designs. How'd you like THAT job?!)


3. PIXEL JUNK EDEN (PSN)

A $9.99 downloadable game off the Playstation Network came >this< close to being the best game of the year. It's got simple, easy-to-master controls and the graphics of old screensavers...but man, if you're not careful, it'll steal your heart. Well, the early levels anyway. For what seems like a carefee, relaxed, laid-back experience, becomes quite challenging about half-way through. The simple notion of jumping from one plant to the next, while spinning into the lil' round things that release more pollen, gets trickier with each and every new level. In fact, I never actually beat the damn thing. But man, I sure had a smile on my face each and every time I played it.


2. DE BLOB (Wii)

Again, the entire time I played this game, a smile graced my face. From ear to ear. It's rare that I play my Wii, and even rarer to play something that isn't a collection of mini-games. De Blob was overlooked and will probably not end up on many "Best of 2008" lists, but dammit, it's amazing! The premise is a simple one. All of the color in the various cities has been removed and you play as a blob who is able to mix and match red, blue, and yellow to create whatever colors the citizens desire. You repaint everything...and I mean everything! Trees come back to life when you brush up against them. Buildings require you to touch each and every wall, jump from one level to the next, in order to let the citizens come back out into the world. You have to play it to understand the joy this game brings. Because it somehow touches into your childhood and how much fun you had coloring away on a white piece of paper, leaving your mark on the world, creating art and having fun.


1. LITTLE BIG PLANET (PS3)

Good Lord. There cannot be a better video game this year...possibly this decade. A simple 2-D sidescroller, Little Big Planet becomes so much more after you've beaten the 50 levels that come with the game. One way to look at this game as one giant tutorial for all the tools they give you throughout the levels. Because there's an entire new experience awaiting you once you get done "playing" and start "creating." And even if you don't want to create a damn thing, there's plenty of people creating levels online every single minute...all over the world! This game has charm, a wow-factor, and makes you feel excited to see what new things are around the corner. This is the reason video games are becoming more and more of a mainstream success story. You can play it alone, with friends, create new levels, challenge your friends online, search the various worlds online like some sort of Youtube system where you get ranked and the cream of the crop rises to the top. This is the future of video games, and I'm glad innovation and creativity is alive and well.

IT MAKES ME CHUCKLE...

The way some people refuse to believe facts.

Anti-Obama Bloggers Challenge Birthplace
That was the headline a couple days ago on the front page of The Kansas City Star.

And man, it sure makes me feel better about these "challenges" when the websites look so 1996 and uber-professional. I mean, it's gots the Bald Eagle!!! And a flagz!! What more "proof" do you need?

Even the always (never) reliable WorldNetDaily is in on the action! They need your help raising money to get a TV ad on the air.

Slate does a good job laying out both the facts (psssssssst...he actually was born in Hawaii!) and the reasons this story won't die anytime soon.

It'd be even funnier if it were so damn sad.

BEST THING FLOATING AROUND THE INTERNETS TODAY...

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF THE YEAR

I know, it's early, there's still an entire month left before 2009...but glancing at Amazon's "New Release" list, I can't see anything coming out between now and the end of the month that would change my mind. (Other than a Cat Power vinyl EP...grrrr...)

Unlike movies, (which I hope to actually get done THIS YEAR) the music industry doesn't wait until the last possible second to release the best it has to offer. So without further ado, here's my picks for the Top 10 Albums of 2008:


10. SHE & HIM * VOLUME: 1

I've loved Zooey Deschanel's voice ever since she sang "Baby, It's Cold Outside" with Leon Redbone on the ELF soundtrack. M. Ward, I actually passed off as just another singer-songwriter who's friends with Jack Johnson. But together, they created one of the sweetest, most romantic melodies of the year. Try and not get goosebumps while listening to "You Really Gotta Hold On Me." It's impossible.


9. NICK CAVE & THE BAD SEEDS * DIG!!! LAZARUS, DIG!!!

Still randy off singing "No Pussy Blues" from his Grinderman days, Nick Cave brought his Bad Seeds along on a wild and adventurous ride following Lazarus's tale of coming back to life. Songs like, "Lie Down Here (And Be My Girl)" and "We Call Upon The Author" demand your full attention, or else there will be consequences.


8. DAVID BYRNE & BRIAN ENO * EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS WILL HAPPEN TODAY

This album would probably be ranked higher if it didn't just come out a couple weeks ago. I've listened to it repeatedly ever since I bought it, and love most of the tracks. A few here and there wander off too far for my taste, but given enough time, I probably would have fallen in love with them all. Give "Life is Long" a spin and see if you dig it as much as I do.


7. FOXBORO HOT TUBS * STOP DROP AND ROLL!!!

I'm a sucker for 50's type sock-hop music. You give me a backbeat, and I'm all yours. Toss in the members of Green Day and a sense of fun and nonsense, and I'm swooning. This record just encompassed the fact that you can sell millions of albums, win plenty of Grammy awards, and still make a silly, pointless album. They are so carefree and loose on here, and songs like "Mother Mary" just echo the call that more bands should try this.


6. RANDY NEWMAN * HARPS & ANGELS

Yes, he's that old guy who sang the Toy Story song. He's also one of the sharpest wits out there and can write a sad love song that can rip your heart out straight from your chest. Oh, and he's damn funny. Basically, he's insanely awesome and you should feel like a total asshole for assuming he's lame. Even Amazon doesn't respect him enough to make his album picture regular size. Go listen to "A Few Words in Defense of Our Country" and educate yourself...fool.


5. BOB DYLAN * TELL TALE SIGNS: BOOTLEG SERIES VOL. 8

Everyone knows I'm a huge Bob Dylan fan. Especially late Dylan. Sure, "Blood on the Tracks" is a classic, but "Time Out of Mind" is the best for me. Lucky for me, this collection of out-takes and B-sides focus mostly off that album and ones thereafter. It's two discs of bliss, (if you're a Dylan fan, obviously. Molly would define it as "torture.") and songs like "Red River Shore" are so good, you wonder how they ended up on the cutting room floor.


4. VAMPIRE WEEKEND

Much like the David Byrne & Brian Eno album, this one is probably suffering from the time it was released. But in this one's case, it's the fact that it's nearly a year old now. Don't get me wrong, it was one of the few albums to match the humongous hype surrounding it, but it's kind of slid a lil' bit in recent months. I love it like it's the 2nd child I'll never have. The other three albums before it are mighty awesome and wonderful...and Vampire Weekend is good too. Just in a different way.


3. LITTLE JOY

A side project from the drummer of The Strokes and the guitarist from Los Hermanos, Little Joy is probably my biggest surprise of the year. It caught me off-guard and completely stole my heart. A cross between The Velvet Underground (with Nico!) and sipping fruity drinks on the beach, this album will make you smile. Period. It's simple, romantic, and short enough that each listen leaves you longing for more. What more could you ask for from a record? Listen to "Don't Watch Me Dancing" and remember what it feels like to get swept off your feet.


2. RA RA RIOT * THE RHUMB LINE

The circumstances surrounding the recording of this album are tragic and weigh heavy on the sound they were able to achieve. Their drummer drown in the ocean following a concert in Massachusetts, and as a band, they had to make the difficult decision of continuing on without him. With only an EP under their belt, The Rhumb Line is actually their debut, and it's simply remarkable. They create a rich sound with stings, dual vocals, and just incredibly catchy pop melodies. This album is top notch and all around a treat for your senses. It took me to the East Coast, even though I've never been to New England. See where songs like, "St. Peter's Day Festival" take you.

1. ELBOW * THE SELDOM SEEN KID

Easily the best album of the year. I made that statement when I bought it, and throughout the entire year, nothing was able to beat it. It's glorious, it's epic, it's outstanding in scope and purpose. Elbow set out to make a masterpiece and they delivered. Each and every song sets the bar higher. This is truly the reason people come up with "Albums of the Year." To showcase something that slides in under the radar. Something that captures the essence of why we all adore music so much. Songs like "One Day Like This" prove that this band is no fluke, and that this record deserves all the praise it can get.

MERRY HANUKKAH!!!

The White House sent out Hanukkah cards last week with a Christmas Tree on them.

Only two months left, folks.

Two. Long. Months.

BESIDES RANTING, I ALSO WRITE REVIEWS

All of these are posted over at INK, but I might as well link to them here as well...

MOVIES

Twilight

Madagascar 2

Zach & Miri Make a Porno

Pride & Glory

W

Religulous

Body of Lies

MUSIC

Gringo Star

Little Joy

The Billy Bats

Billy Wassung

Amanda Palmer

ANOTHER RANT ON WHY VOTERS SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO TAKE AWAY HUMAN RIGHTS

I was reading the Rolling Stone review of MILK last night, (I know Jamie, I shouldn't read them and spoil the experience for myself) and came across a startling fact.

Harvey Milk, (who later became the first openly gay man elected to public office in California, on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors) was fighting against a "California Proposition" of his own. The year was 1978, (one year before I was born) and "Prop. 6" was hoping to ban homosexuals from teaching in public schools in California.

...seriously.

One week before the election, with public opinion polls showing nearly 61% in favor of the Proposition, Ronald Reagan wrote an editorial in opposition to it, in which he stated, "Whatever else it is, homosexuality is not a contagious disease like the measles. Prevailing scientific opinion is that an individual's sexuality is determined at a very early age and that a child's teachers do not really influence this."

Just let that sink in for a second. The Godfather of Conservatism was against this bullshit proposition. Good for him.

And even though it ultimately failed, similar propositions had already passed in Oklahoma and Arkansas. Is this something we also should have let voters in states decide for themselves? At what point do we realize that it's not our place to take rights away from people? We cannot, and should not vote on civil rights. They are our birthright. We're have them from the moment we're born, no matter how much voters might want to take them away.

I can't wait for the California Supreme Court to finally overturn Prop. 8 early next year, on grounds that it's unconstitutional. And 30 years from now, let my son look back on this moment in history and wonder, "Why the fuck were they even debating that in the first place?!"

PROOF THAT THERE IS NO GOD

Pushing Daisies has been canceled.


The only bright spot is that the series creator adores the world he created so much, that he's going to continue the stories in comic book form! (Ala Buffy.)

Meanwhile, Knight Rider is still on TV.

YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE THIS VIDEO!!!

Because even after I finished watching it, I still don't believe my eyes...

On Thursday, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, "pardoned" a turkey for Thanksgiving. Big fucking deal, right? Happens all the time.

The problem is, after doing that, she moved over to a different area and took some questions from the media. And in the background, I swear to God, a man is SLAUGHTERING a turkey!!!

Watch and see for yourself, as long as you don't have a weak stomach:



Her life is just one long Daily Show episode.

NEWSFLASH: AL-QAIDA HATES OBAMA?!

But...but...I thought Obama was friends with terrorists?!

And nice use of the term, "house Negroes" boys. As if you all weren't hated enough.

I FEEL FOR THOSE OF YOU WITHOUT HBO...

...cause you're going to miss this tonight...

A VOTE AGAINST LOVE

Keith Olbermann was in rare form last night. He almost lost it a couple times during this Special Comment speaking out against those who defeated Prop. 8 in California. It's heartbreaking to watch, but all the more reason to never give up the fight. We're on the right side of history on this issue. Young people, future generations have no fear of homosexuality...and one day, we will outnumber those who do.



(full text below)

Finally tonight as promised, a Special Comment on the passage, last week, of Proposition Eight in California, which rescinded the right of same-sex couples to marry, and tilted the balance on this issue, from coast to coast.

Some parameters, as preface. This isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics, and this isn't really just about Prop-8. And I don't have a personal investment in this: I'm not gay, I had to strain to think of one member of even my very extended family who is, I have no personal stories of close friends or colleagues fighting the prejudice that still pervades their lives.

And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics.

This is about the... human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it.

If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not... understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want -- a chance to be a little less alone in the world.

Only now you are saying to them -- no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights -- even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?

I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage.

If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal... in 1967. 1967.

The parents of the President-Elect of the United States couldn't have married in nearly one third of the states of the country their son grew up to lead. But it's worse than that. If this country had not "re-defined" marriage, some black people still couldn't marry...black people. It is one of the most overlooked and cruelest parts of our sad story of slavery. Marriages were not legally recognized, if the people were slaves. Since slaves were property, they could not legally be husband and wife, or mother and child. Their marriage vows were different: not "Until Death, Do You Part," but "Until Death or Distance, Do You Part." Marriages among slaves were not legally recognized.

You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are... gay.

And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing -- centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children... All because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage. How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?

What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough.

It is stacked against love, and against hope, and against those very few and precious emotions that enable us to go forward. Your marriage only stands a 50-50 chance of lasting, no matter how much you feel and how hard you work.

And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadnesses, this is what your conscience tells you to do?

With your knowledge that life, with endless vigor, seems to tilt the playing field on which we all live, in favor of unhappiness and hate... this is what your heart tells you to do? You want to sanctify marriage? You want to honor your God and the universal love you believe he represents? Then Spread happiness -- this tiny, symbolic, semantical grain of happiness -- share it with all those who seek it. Quote me anything from your religious leader or book of choice telling you to stand against this. And then tell me how you can believe both that statement and another statement, another one which reads only "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

---

You are asked now, by your country, and perhaps by your creator, to stand on one side or another. You are asked now to stand, not on a question of politics, not on a question of religion, not on a question of gay or straight. You are asked now to stand, on a question of...love. All you need do is stand, and let the tiny ember of love meet its own fate. You don't have to help it, you don't have it applaud it, you don't have to fight for it. Just don't put it out. Just don't extinguish it. Because while it may at first look like that love is between two people you don't know and you don't understand and maybe you don't even want to know...It is, in fact, the ember of your love, for your fellow **person...

Just because this is the only world we have. And the other guy counts, too.

This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.

But what he said, fits what is really at the heart of this:

"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge.

"It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all:

"So I be written in the Book of Love;

"I do not care about that Book above.

"Erase my name, or write it as you will,

"So I be written in the Book of Love."

---

Good night, and good luck.

SARAH PALIN'S LATEST INTERVIEW

It was on FOX and they seriously spend SIX MINUTES on her stupid clothes...





Also, I've never blogged from my parent's basement.

WILLIAM AYERS SPEAKS...

...er, types.

Shockingly, it seems everything we've been lead to believe about the man might not be as black & white as it once seemed. Sure, what he did back in the 60's gives anyone a reason to pause...but the way the media and both Hillary and McCain's campaigns turned him into the Ultimate Boogeyman, was absurd.

COME BY AND SAY HELLO!!!

I did five new paintings (which I'm slooooooooowly starting to actually enjoy) and am showcasing my latest mini-comic collection of political strips. Usually I ask $2.00, but for you, it's free!

PALIN DIDN'T KNOW AFRICA WAS A CONTINENT?!

I swear to God, someone better get this woman a sitcom!!!

YES WE DID!

(image stolen from the awesome Christine Norrie )

Well, that was sure fun, eh?!

I cried like a babyhead last night, watching MSNBC discuss the various options and paths that Obama could take in order to reach 270. Then, in a matter of mere seconds, call Oregon, Washington, and California for Obama, pushing him well over 270 and allowing the crowds gathered all over the country to take center stage for over five minutes of pure cheering, joy and excitement!



I still get goosebumps watching that.

Words cannot express how incredible it feels to know that America is shifting in a new direction. The world is welcoming us back with open arms, and we'll have the next four years to correct the mistakes of the previous eight. It's not going to be easy, you still have half the country thinking that Obama is a "Socialist," or even worse...and that's fine. Let them pout and be dismissive and wrong. They're quite comfortable with making up excuses whenever the facts don't fall in their favor. But we, you and I, must rise above it. We must lead this great nation into the high expectations we have set our hopes and dreams upon. We can't get caught up in bitter, petty fighting. Let the other side bitch and moan and offer nothing but fear and paranoia. Let them own their failures. We'll be too busy creating our successes.

We've come this far, there's no use in slowing down now.

(PS...please don't think I'm going to stop with the sarcasm and namecalling...it's my bread and butter, and dammit, I'm quite good at it. I'm simply saying that we can't get too caught up in that, because we have bigger problems to worry about. Over the next few months, the Republicans are going to do everything in their power to belittle President Obama and paint him out to be the next Jimmy Carter, and I'm more than willing to call them out on their bullshit.

That said, they're not even worth arguing with anymore. I've glanced at some of the usual "Here comes President Handout" blogs and websites today, and it's just so sad and hopeless to even attempt to correct them any longer. Let them hang themselves on the failed politics of old. The smear campaigns and fear tactics don't work any more and people want real solutions to real problems. Not the lame re-hashing of the last 30 years.

...and most of all, CHEER UP!

We kicked their ass for once! It's time to celebrate.)

TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF SALT...

...but it's pretty much a given.



Andrew Gelman of Columbia University has taken a recent set of our simulations to look at what may happen conditional on the outcomes of the first states to close their polls at 6 and 7 PM. The bottom line? If those states go roughly as expected (meaning, say, an Obama win in Virginia and a close race in Indiana), we can conclude with almost literal 100 percent certainty that Obama will win the election.

Gotta love them 'puters.

BETTER PRAY HARDER!

Sarah Palin just cast her vote up in Wasilla, Alaska and offered her thoughts about the outcome of tonight's election:

“Now tomorrow, I hope, I pray, I believe that I'll be able to wake up as Vice President elect, and be able to get to work in a transition mode with the President elect, John McCain.”

And when asked if she voted for CONVICTED FELON Senator Ted "Internet's a series of tubes" Stevens, she added:

“I am also exercising my right to privacy, and I don't have to tell anybody who I vote for, nobody does, and that’s really cool about America also.”

You know, I think I'm going to miss her awesome ability to end sentences with "also" most of all.

WHEN YOU HAVE NO ISSUES TO RUN ON, RATCHET UP THE FEAR TACTICS!

Living in Missouri, (a close, almost completely tied, swing state,) we've been hit hard with anti-Obama mailers recently. I meant to scan them last night, but got sidetracked with getting my comics done for INK and The Star. So I found some online, all of which we've actually received: (aside from the wanting to kill babies one...but that one was too creepy to ignore)










Good ol' RNC. Poor fuckers can't figure out why they're going to lose by a landslide tomorrow. I mean, this shit worked a few years ago...sigh...

NOT EVEN CLOSE.

Don't let Drudge fool you, this election isn't based on National Polls, it's based off states and the Electoral College. And it's not even close. Not by a long shot.



George W. Bush won Montana by 20 points in his re-election victory four years ago. But it seems the times have changed in the state.

CNN's new Electoral College map, updated Sunday morning, moves Montana from "lean John McCain" to "toss up." The move is partially based on our new CNN Poll of Polls in Montana, compiled Friday, which suggests McCain, the Republican presidential candidate, has a one-point lead over his Democratic rival Barack Obama, 46 percent to 45 percent. Nine percent of voters are undecided.

"The fact that Montana is up for grabs has to be extremely unsettling for the McCain campaign," said CNN Senior Political Researcher Alan Silverleib. "Montana's usually a reliably Republican state in presidential campaigns. It's been won by the Democrats only twice in the past half century. If you're a Republican and you're fighting for Montana in the last few days of the campaign, you're not in good shape."

Three electoral votes are at stake in Montana, a state Obama visited in late August. McCain has not campaigned in Montana during the general election.

With Montana moving to "toss-up," CNN estimates that if the election were held today, Obama would win states worth 291 electoral votes — more than enough to capture the White House

McCain would take states worth 157 electoral votes, while states worth a combined total of 90 electoral votes would still be up for grabs. A candidate needs 270 electoral votes to win.

"JOHN McCAIN, NOT HUSSEIN!"

Stay classy, Palin supporters!

SARAH PALIN, THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING

Is there ANYTHING this woman actually understands? She's incorrectly stated the job of the Vice President four separate times, and now is claiming that the media is threatening her First Amendment rights by criticizing her. I shit you not...

ABC News' Steven Portnoy reports: In a conservative radio interview that aired in Washington, D.C. Friday morning, Republican vice presidential nominee Gov. Sarah Palin said she fears her First Amendment rights may be threatened by "attacks" from reporters who suggest she is engaging in a negative campaign against Barack Obama.

Palin told WMAL-AM that her criticism of Obama's associations, like those with 1960s radical Bill Ayers and the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, should not be considered negative attacks. Rather, for reporters or columnists to suggest that it is going negative may constitute an attack that threatens a candidate's free speech rights under the Constitution, Palin said.

"If [the media] convince enough voters that that is negative campaigning, for me to call Barack Obama out on his associations," Palin told host Chris Plante, "then I don't know what the future of our country would be in terms of First Amendment rights and our ability to ask questions without fear of attacks by the mainstream media."

Are you batshit insane, woman?! The First Amendment has absolutely NOTHING to do with you getting asked questions and "attacked" by the media. It's about giving you the right of free speech, which you use waaaaaaaaaay more than you should. You're an embarrassment to us all.

But...there is the other part of me that almost wants her around for the next four years, just to hear what incredible nonsensical bullshit she thinks up next. Maybe Obama can hire her as his Press Secretary?!

MORE PROOF OBAMA IS A "SOCIALIST!"

That liberal, Marxist, Commie magazine, THE ECONOMIST just endorsed his "Let's spread the wealth" ass.

...what's that? They're actually heavily interested in free trade and free markets?! But...but...that doesn't make any sense?! Why wouldn't they endorse that capitalistic mother fucker John McCain?!

Best part of the endorsement:

If only the real John McCain had been running

That, however, was Senator McCain; the Candidate McCain of the past six months has too often seemed the victim of political sorcery, his good features magically inverted, his bad ones exaggerated. The fiscal conservative who once tackled Mr Bush over his unaffordable tax cuts now proposes not just to keep the cuts, but to deepen them. The man who denounced the religious right as “agents of intolerance” now embraces theocratic culture warriors. The campaigner against ethanol subsidies (who had a better record on global warming than most Democrats) came out in favour of a petrol-tax holiday. It has not all disappeared: his support for free trade has never wavered. Yet rather than heading towards the centre after he won the nomination, Mr McCain moved to the right.

Meanwhile his temperament, always perhaps his weak spot, has been found wanting. Sometimes the seat-of-the-pants method still works: his gut reaction over Georgia—to warn Russia off immediately—was the right one. Yet on the great issue of the campaign, the financial crisis, he has seemed all at sea, emitting panic and indecision. Mr McCain has never been particularly interested in economics, but, unlike Mr Obama, he has made little effort to catch up or to bring in good advisers (Doug Holtz-Eakin being the impressive exception).

The choice of Sarah Palin epitomised the sloppiness. It is not just that she is an unconvincing stand-in, nor even that she seems to have been chosen partly for her views on divisive social issues, notably abortion. Mr McCain made his most important appointment having met her just twice.

Ironically, given that he first won over so many independents by speaking his mind, the case for Mr McCain comes down to a piece of artifice: vote for him on the assumption that he does not believe a word of what he has been saying. Once he reaches the White House, runs this argument, he will put Mrs Palin back in her box, throw away his unrealistic tax plan and begin negotiations with the Democratic Congress. That is plausible; but it is a long way from the convincing case that Mr McCain could have made. Had he become president in 2000 instead of Mr Bush, the world might have had fewer problems. But this time it is beset by problems, and Mr McCain has not proved that he knows how to deal with them.

WHY OBAMA IS GOING TO LOSE...

Dammit...it seemed like such a sure thing three days ago...

Then my best friend Jon emailed me this:


This seriously might hurt him worse than the William Ayers bullshit. I mean, what the fuck happens in the middle of this video?! Are they fighting or hugging? And does voting for Obama make you go insane to the point that wearing a dolphin hat seems like a good idea?!

Maybe voting for McCain isn't such a bad idea afterall...

WHY OBAMA IS GOING TO WIN

St. Louis.
100,000 people.


Kansas City.
75,000 people.


Denver.
100,000 people.


McCain and Palin couldn't attract these many supporters if they tried. Their biggest crowds topped out around 23,000.

You can't gather a lot of supporters when you're busy dividing them apart.

THE McCAIN CAMPAIGN STARTING TO IMPLODE

With 10 days remaining, polls not showing a likely victory, that pesky Electoral College showing it's not even going to be close, the McCain advisers are starting the finger pointing...and it's all directed at Sarah "Hockey Lipstick Beauty Pitbull" Palin.

Who DIDN'T see this coming?!

McCain sources say Palin has gone off-message several times, and they privately wonder whether the incidents were deliberate. They cited an instance in which she labeled robocalls -- recorded messages often used to attack a candidate's opponent -- "irritating" even as the campaign defended their use. Also, they pointed to her telling reporters she disagreed with the campaign's decision to pull out of Michigan.

A second McCain source says she appears to be looking out for herself more than the McCain campaign.

"She is a diva. She takes no advice from anyone," said this McCain adviser. "She does not have any relationships of trust with any of us, her family or anyone else.

"Also, she is playing for her own future and sees herself as the next leader of the party. Remember: Divas trust only unto themselves, as they see themselves as the beginning and end of all wisdom."

THE DEPTHS McCAIN SUPPORTERS WILL SINK TO...

***UPDATE***
She now admitted it was complete bullshit. To think that McCain and Palin actually CALLED this girl, ran with this story, attempted to make it a political issue. They should all be ashamed of themselves. Their race-baiting tactics and getting their supporters wrapped up in paranoid schemes. Is it any wonder she tried this? It NEARLY worked!
***UPDATE***


This story broke late last night, and at the time, Drudge had it above the headline, attempting to make it TEH BIGGEST STORY EVAR!!!

And hey, with a photo like this, it's no wonder the AP ran with it, hours later:



A knife-wielding man robbed a McCain-Palin campaign volunteer and etched a "B" into her face after he saw a McCain bumper sticker on her car, the woman told Pittsburgh police.

Todd told police she handed the man $60 she had in her pocket and stepped away from him. The man then noticed the bumper sticker on her car, which was parked in front of the ATM, and became angry, she told police.

He made comments to Todd about Republican presidential candidate John McCain and punched her in the back of the head, knocking her to the ground, police said Todd told them.

"He continued to kick and punch her repeatedly and said he would teach her a lesson for supporting John McCain," said police Chief Nate Harper.

The man scratched a backward "B" onto Todd's right cheek, she told police. Todd, who isn't familiar with the area, drove to a friend's house nearby. She told her friend she wasn't sure of the exact location the robbery happened but remembered a green sign above the ATM.

The friend called police and an officer met them at his house. They drove along Liberty Avenue until Todd saw a Citizens Bank ATM that looked familiar, police said.

Police said Todd declined medical treatment at the scene. Her friend, a law student at University of Pittsburgh, said he took her to UPMC Shadyside for treatment.

Police said she described the attacker as black, about 6-foot-4, and said he was wearing dark-colored jeans and a black tank top. She said he had a knife with a 5-inch blade and ran from the scene on foot, Harper said.

But, too much of this "attack" doesn't add up. Luckily, many on the internet are putting together pieces that don't fit together, and the police are giving her a lie detector, so the truth will be revealed shortly.

* The "B" carved into her face is backwards, (although that might have appeared correctly in a mirror?!) and never breaks the skin. What kind of knife did he use? Plastic?!

* You're going to rob someone at 9pm, get the cash, and stick around for another 10 minutes to carve a letter into someone's face? Allowing potential witnesses to see you and for your victim to struggle and make more of a scene? All to make a political statement?! Does that make any sense?

* After this horrible ordeal, she REFUSES medical treatment. Instead, she updates her Twitter account?!

It's a shame that shit like this spreads like wildfire so easily. A white McCain supporter gets assaulted by a black Obama supporter. Who needs anything else? That mother fucker is guilty...even if he doesn't actually exist.

JOHN McCAIN IS A SOCIALIST?!

Well, at least he USED to be...back when John McCain was John McCain and not the "change my mind every other day depending on if it might win me an election" Man he is now.



The bottom line is how utterly absurd this "Obama is a Socialist" talking point has become. Along with the notion that tax cuts for 95% of the American workers is somehow "welfare." We've tried it the other way for too long. Giving tax credits and corporate "welfare" to the top didn't trickle down shit. The wealthy got more wealthy and the poor got more poor. It's time we got our priorities in order and looked out for those in the middle. Focus on the average plumbers, not the ones making $250,000 a year.

And by the way, I was curious just how "massive" this tax raise was going to be for those individuals making OVER $250,000, so I looked it up. I dunno about you, but from all the panic and fear that Republicans had been spewing, I figured it was going to be insanely high. Turns out, it simply goes back to the level it was under Clinton.

It's now at 36%, and Obama's going to raise it to 39%

HOLY SHITBALLS!!! THREE POINTS?!

I really feel for those rich bastards.

I <3 BANKSY

(My wife mentioned this to me the other day and I totally forgot to blog about it!)

Street Guerrilla Artist BANSKY opened a Pet Store (and Grill) in New York recently. Check it out if you live nearby.

Some highlights:

TONIGHT

Be there or go fuck yourself.
(Sorry, just saw "W" and can't quit quoting Cheney.)

CREEPY RACIST GUY AT PALIN RALLY

This video was what I saw first, a couple days ago, taken by the CBS News team covering the rally.

He's all smiles, holding onto his Curious George doll around with an Obama 08 bumper sticker wrapped around it's head...until he notices the camera crew staring up at him. He quickly rips the sticker off, stands there like a sweating doofus, looking back and forth, eventually hands the doll to the boy in front of him. It was creepy and send chills down my spine.


...that was until I came across ANOTHER video of this same asshole!!! This time, taken on his way into the Town Hall, and he's talking to the camera and waving it around, as proud as he can be...


This has gotten out of control.

THE HOLE McCAIN HAS DUG HIMSELF INTO

Here's the problem with going nasty with fierce attack ads...they work. They get people riled up and angry, because they're already desperate for an easy target to lay their worries and fears upon.

So, after spending the better part of two weeks asking questions like, "Who IS Barack Obama?" and attempting to make him best friends with "terrorists," John McCain faced the difficult challenge of trying to correct his audience.

McCain was responding to a town hall attendee who claimed he was concerned about raising a child under a president who "cohorts with domestic terrorists such as [Bill] Ayers." Despite the fact that McCain and his campaign have repeatedly used Ayers to hammer Obama in recent days, the Arizona Senator tried to calm the man.

"[Senator Obama] is a decent person and a person that you do not have to be scared about as President of the United States," he said, before adding: "If I didn't think I would be one heck of a better president I wouldn't be running."

The crowd groaned with disapproval.

*****

"I don't trust Obama," a woman said. "I have read about him. He's an Arab."

"No, ma'am," McCain said several times, shaking his head in disagreement. "He's a decent, family man, [a] citizen that I just happen to have disagreements with on fundamental issues and that's what this campaign is all about."

Gee, John, I wonder why she'd get a crazy idea like that?! Maybe she didn't see all those television ads where you talked about Obama being a "decent, family man?!"

Oh, that's right, because you chose to make him appear scary and dangerous instead...

BARACK OSAMA?!

This supposedly went through 3 sets of "proof readers" and still ended up on hundreds of official ballots in New York State’s Rensselaer County.

Somebody needs to be fired over this shit. How can it be a "typo" when the S and B keys aren't even near each other on the keyboard?!

SAW A NEW McCAIN AD ON TV TONIGHT...

...and apparently, he CAN sink lower:


Here's the reason this ad is beyond the pale. John McCain said basically the EXACT SAME THING back in 2000, about the Kosovo air raids...


And that line about "Liberals voting against funding the troops" leaves out that McCain did the very same thing, because he didn't agree with "timetables for withdrawl." Not to mention that none of those bills ever passed.

But that's just silly ol' me trying to interject "facts" into a campaign that feeds on lies and smears. Who needs truth when your favorite Republican talking point is "The Liberals hate the troops!!" It works too, right?!

What's that?

The polls are actually showing that this constant negative campaigning is HURTING McCain with Independents? Especially women? But...I thought those bitches knew their place once he picked Palin?!

Hmmmmmmm...

The best part of watching this ad air in between the commercial breaks for The Office tonight was hearing Molly's reaction. She's hardly the political junkie I am, and much more "down the middle" than a furious Liberal bleeding heart freak like me. After John McCain's creepy, glowing smiling face comes on there with his, "I approve this message" quote, she shakes her head in disgust and says, "He should be ashamed of himself."

Truer words have never been spoken.

McCAIN'S LAST GRASP

This is it. This is all he has. One last chance to scare the American public into thinking that Obama is dangerous, has terrorist "friends," and is somehow hiding his "true agenda."

It's a 1:30 ad called "Ayers" and is the same old bullshit everyone's heard for months now...only with a bitchy woman's voice added for effect:


And for anyone (one of you) who thinks this is the kind of thing that McCain NEEDS to do with less than a month away from the election, check out this clip of a guy asking questions before a McCain-Palin rally in Ohio. The people come out and say that Obama is a terrorist, in a manner that it's somehow just assumed at this point. Like, "Duh! His name is Muslim, what else you need to know?!"



And before you act like these are random people and they don't speak for the campaign...who do you think these ads are trying to preach to? They're nothing but red meat for these kind of paranoid, creepy, borderline racist nutjobs.

It boils down to this...

Do you want to lift people up, have them come together for the greater good, bringing out the best of us, in an attempt to get America back on track?

Or do you want to divide us into hating one another with fear and paranoia, bringing out the worst in us, just so you can win an election?

It's that simple.

DJ Z-TRIP'S OBAMA MIX!

It's an hour of the most incredible, awe inspiriting blend of hope and beats you'll ever hear. And it's completely free.

Pass it around.

Get everyone pumped up.

And quit worrying...

We're going to win this thing.

30 LIES REFUTED ABOUT AYERS AND OBAMA

A nice read, if you have the time, of why this is such a bullshit issue.

A few examples of the silliness they're attempting to scare voters with:

LIE: "Barack Obama is friends with Ayers, defending him as quote 'respectable and mainstream.'"(American Issues Project ad, August 2008)

TRUTH: David Axelrod described them as "friendly," not friends. Obama didn't call Ayers respectable and mainstream (although Ayers now is); Obama's campaign on his website posted an op-ed in the press that described Ayers that way.

*****

LIE: "They live half a mile from William Ayers, the unrepentant terrorist" and "Just a half a mile from those homes is Louis Farrakhan."(Hannity's America, October 5, 2008, "Obama and His Friends: History of Radicalism")

TRUTH: It's true, of course, that Obama lives in this same neighborhood, as do tens of thousands of other people who presumably are also guilty by geographical association. The logic of this argument would be, if you live half a mile from a sex offender, then you agree with child molesters.

OBAMA IS "PALLIN' AROUND WITH TERRORISTS?!"

Here's a new low for the McCain campaign. This William Ayers-Weather Underground shit was weak from the beginning, but for Sarah Palin to suddenly bring it up again now, a month before the election?! And to question Obama's patriotism a few lines before it?! It's so pathetic and laughable.

Just admit it, you Republican fucks, you simply want people to be afraid of Obama. You're going to rely on fear once again, in hopes of scaring enough people into voting for your candidate. It would be shameful if it would actually work. But not this time, not this year.

Citizens across this great land have had enough of your tactics. They see through this, they realize it's nothing more than a distraction. That's why Jeremiah Wright didn't make that much of an impact. It's the reason this Weather Underground bullshit never stuck. The reason the "he doesn't wear a flag pin" and "not putting his hand over his heart" emails simply faded away after a couple of months.

Because in the end, none of that helps us move this country forward. None of that matters. It's Gay Marriage all over again. A non-issue that doesn't help get anyone a job, health insurance, a helping hand when they're in times of need.

It's just red meat for the kind of people that think chanting "USA USA USA!" proves you love America more than the rest of us.



Well, I have news for you, you don't.

I love this country so much, that I don't need to showcase it. I don't need to act like the troops are on my side, or that God is either. No magnetic ribbon on my car is needed. America isn't my Mother, I don't need to kiss it's ass. I'm secure enough to point out it's flaws, to attempt to make it better, and above all, realize that it doesn't need to be perfect.

So, and I'm really honest here, I hope McCain and his Hockey Mom keep this up. Keep trying to make Obama out to be that "creepy Black guy with a funny name and evil terrorist friends." Go ahead. Run on nothing but negitivity and scare tactics. Give the Amercian people a clear choice on November 4th.

Hope vs. Fear

I like them odds.

THE DAILY SHOW HAS BEEN ON FIRE LATELY

I loved this segment, especially watching John McCain go back and forth on why the bailout bill sucked and then why he ultimately voted for it...


And am I alone in thinking, Kristen Schaal needs to join the team permanently?

BILL O'REILLY, INTERVIEWER EXTRAORDINARE

DID PALIN ANSWER A SINGLE QUESTION SHE WAS ASKED?!

That's what I want to know. Watching this response from her was jaw-droppingly stupid.


My favorite moment of the night was watching Joe Biden go off on her for talking talking talking, but not answering anything. She bitched about "Pointing fingers towards the past" but did nothing, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to seperate her and McCain from George W. Bush and these past 8 years.


Will someone explain to her that "being a Maverick" isn't a policy?! This was so painful to watch. She's so overly coached, so mismanaged and handled by the McCain campaign that they might as well just have had a soundboard of various clips and let Gwen Ifil press them from time to time to hear "McCain's viewpoint."

It's a disgrace to allow her to continue on and you Conservatives know it. She's in way over her head and it's a shame that the McCain campaign let it go this far.

"Country First" my ass.

IT HAS BEGUN...

This is when things start getting interesting. Only 4 weeks until the election, and the campaigns realize that some states are no longer "toss-ups." Well, today the McCain campaign took Michigan off the table. No more advertising, no more campaign stops, it's over.

I'm sure it's just the beginning of the end now. With 3 HUGELY competitive states now swinging in Obama's favor, McCain better hope there's nothing else that could derail his Straight Talk Express.

...oh, except for his Hockey Mom going before a national audience tonight during the VP debate. What's the worst that could happen?!

The good thing is that she reads every newspaper and magazine out there. Yes, ALL of them:


She also thought it would be funny to mention that Joe Biden has been in the Senate for a loooooong time, even though she's running with a 72 year old Grandpa:


And don't get me started on her idea of what we should do with women that have been victims of rape or incest:


She is truly a gift that keeps on giving.

CRANKYPANTS McCAIN

This is what happens when your campaign starts falling apart. You get pissy and dismissive at the media...who are recording you...and it ends up all over the internet and evening news...and your poll numbers continue to drop...and...

BILL MAHER ON THE VIEW

I just saw a screening of Religulous last night, and while I can't really talk about it until my review hits Friday, I think you all probably know I'm a huge fan of Bill Maher. He's been doing a lot of press lately, and I caught this segment of him on The View yesterday:




It gets pretty testy and proves that religion is something a lot of people simply do not want to discuss. (much like politics, which is why I'm lame for constantly bringing up both!)

LETTERMAN HIGHLIGHTS SOME OF BUSH'S "PROMISES"

Wow. This was just brutal to watch.



He's never come out swinging like this before an election before...to my memory anyway. I think McCain seriously pissed him off a couple weeks ago.

THE FUNNIEST THING ABOUT SNL'S PALIN SKIT...

...was that they used Sarah Palin's exact words...and the audience STILL laughs as if it were comedy!!!

THE DEBATE HASN'T EVEN HAPPENED YET...

...but McCain has already won?!

That's fucking rich. He goes from "I'm suspending my campaign until we reach a deal on this bailout!" (Even though the campaign offices across the country never closed their doors, you could continue to donate to his campaign on their website, and he, himself kept appearing on news programs every night) to "Oh, I guess I can't be in on any actual meetings dealing with the bailout since I'm not on any of those commitees, so lemme go ahead and debate afterall!" to "By the way, I already won it, bitches!" in the matter of three days.

This election is done being close. McCain has completely destroyed any hope of being taken seriously after this week.

SARAH PALIN, YOUR NEXT VICE PRESIDENT

I take back every mean thing I've ever said about this woman. Especially after watching the 3rd clip.

Part One


Part Two


Part Three


Ok, ok...I'm a total fucking liar. She's got an incredible talent in that I actually feel sorry for her and feel for my country's well-being every single time she talks. I mean...Holy shit. How about that amazingly thoughtful "good guys vs bad guys" diplomacy arguement, eh? Who needs nuance in times of war & peace?! Just go with your gut!!! Cause that's reeeeeeeeeally worked out nicely for these past eight years.

Not to mention that it just came out in the news recently that Israel wanted to strike Iran's nuclear facilities earlier this year and BUSH (of all people) told them no! How's that for not "second guessing" them?!

Sarah Palin. When it comes to foreign relations, (and most everything else) she makes Bush look smart.

GO HERE NOW!!!

Support Obama, support local artist Matt Hawkins, and create kick-ass paper toys at the very same time!

ARE YOU SHITTING ME?!

Here's the deal for all you haters out there, telling me to quit picking on McCain. I'll stop bringing up the stupid shit he does when he quits doing stupid shit.

Like SUSPENDING HIS CAMPAIGN?!

I was off work today, and spent most of it playing De Blob, away from the computer...so when I watched Countdown and heard that McCain was suspending his campaign and wanting to delay the Friday debate, I thought it was a joke. Surely he's not that stupid? Surely he knows the media and late-night talk show hosts are going to have a FIELD DAY with that kind of insanely ridiculous decision...

But no. It was true.

And boy, was Letterman all over him tonight:

He canceled on Dave to appear on Katie Couric's Evening News WHILE Letterman was taping!!! TV doesn't get any better than this, folks!

Sorry, John. Running for President is tough. Being President is even tougher. This ain't high school volleyball, you don't get a timeout if you're winded and behind on the score board.

THINGS THAT CHEER ME UP

I've kind of been in a pissy, bitter mood today. Luckily, I have the internet and some free time (finally) to create a lil' list of things that bring a smile to my face!

De Blob!

It comes out today and I can't wait to play it when I get home!

Lego Batman: The Video Game

Also comes out today, and Lex is all sorts of excited, thanks to these kick-ass McDonalds toys!

Kid Robot Simpsons figures!

I haven't actually found these in stores yet...but it's been a couple weeks since I've made it out to the comic shop. So they're probably just waiting for me.

Cold War Kids * Loyalty to Loyalty

Fucking fantastic album that reaches much farther than their debut did.

Jenny Lewis * Acid Tongue

Again, a terrific follow-up to her incredible first release. I secretly enjoy her solo stuff more than the Rilo Kiley ones.

"RIGHT, BUT THEY ALL SPEAK MEXICAN, RIGHT?!"

That's the only thing missing from all of this nonsense. One extra quote that would have shined a light into what the hell John McCain could have possibly been thinking when he answered a question about meeting with the Spanish Prime Minister Zapatero, by talking about Mexico and other Latin America countries.

Seriously.

A BLOG POST TO CHEER EVERYONE UP (UNLESS YOU'RE "ANONYMOUS")

I'm going to go ahead and warn everyone (all three of you reading this) that I'm not going to hold back on this blog post. This is bound to be the craziest, most obscene, and angriest blog I've ever written, and most of it isn't even directed at "Anonymous."

OK, it is. And every stupid mother fucker like him. They are the reason this country gets stuck with Presidents like George W. Bush for eight god damn years. Two terms. They're the ones who saw the first four years and went, "Yeah I'd like more of that please!" The kind that "Thanked God" Al Gore wasn't President on 9/11, cause he would have given the terrorists a Powerpoint presentation and then hugged some trees.

The kind of asshole who has supported the most divisive, wedge-driven administration in our Nation's history...and is now telling me to "be nice" and to not "be sarcastic" with Sarah Palin. Don't make fun of John McCain because he's old! These fucking Republican asshats could have given a rat's ass about the elderly, or working Mothers, or pregnant teenagers, UNTIL THEY WERE ON THEIR SIDE. Then it's totally different.

It's like hating homosexuals...except the one you work with, cause he's kinda nice. And not threatening. HE'S okay, but the rest of them are going to totally burn in Hell. Especially if they attempt to get married!!!

I have a hunch I know who "anonymous" is and it's not just the fact that he came over here and started talking shit, (Check out the comments to the "EXACTLY" post down below with the Simpsons as McCain and Palin to see what the fuck I'm talking about.) It was the way he's trying to give me advice. Telling me that I'm making things worse for the Democratic party and how it's because of people like me that "Independents are going over to McCain in droves!" Letting me know that I'M part of the problem.

Oh, and it was because he was too chickenshit to own up to his words. Which is fine. If I was spreading this much bullshit all over the internet, I wouldn't want to leave my name either.

So here it is. Laid out for the world to see. Much like how Walter responds in The Big Lebowski, "This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!!!" (...or just attempt to argue with me about politics. I go all out, fo' reals.)

Here's his last comment, (before I changed the settings so that "anonymous" is no longer an option to post under) that I'm going to tear apart piece by piece:

**********
Even if someone from the McCain campaign said Obama was a Muslim(I'm not aware of anyone who has.), what difference does it make? Since when is calling someone a Muslim a slur? Obama himself has said he's a Christian and I'll take his word on it.

Why do you think Obama is so qualified to be President? Obama himself said in 2004 he didn't think a run for the Presidency in 2008 was a good idea:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BnLozS-TnM

As to the name calling and sarcasm, it's up to you. Look at the polls and the size of the McCain/Palin rallies to see what the continued personal attacks are doing to help the other side.

The Obama "attacks" seem to have been questioning his associations and trying to find out what the public record has shown who he is. The associations came to the front when everyone looked and saw there isn't much of a public record out there on him. Repeated efforts to access documents on his time in the state house were turned back because reporters were told no such records exist.

However, I've heard no one speculate whether his daughters are in fact his or not. I've heard no one question his ability to be President while having young children. I've heard few, if any, hard questions directed at Joe Biden and his record in the Senate.

All I have to say is if you look at Obama's record and his purported claims that he will bring a new climate of bipartisanship to Washington and compare it to the record, and you do the same with McCain, there isn't much of a comparison.

As to Palin's response to the Bush Doctrine, look at what the person who coined the phrase has to say about that:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/09/12/AR2008091202457.html?hpid=opinionsbox1

It's fine to support your candidate. We'll likely have a difference of opinion on who we're voting for this year. But if you don't recognize that the Obama/Biden campaign is selling out the central reason they were running to begin with, you're going to be disappointed on November 5.

P.S. If you want me to sign my name, change your blogger setup so anonymous isn't an option. Based on the infrequency of the comments your blog is receiving, I'd recommend not doing that since it's likely to keep the number of comments even lower than they currently are.
**********

Wow, that last line really hurt. Well, I suppose we'll just start from the top, eh?

Even if someone from the McCain campaign said Obama was a Muslim(I'm not aware of anyone who has.), what difference does it make? Since when is calling someone a Muslim a slur? Obama himself has said he's a Christian and I'll take his word on it.

Holy fucking shit. Are you kidding me? Since when is calling someone a Muslim a slur?! In a political arena?! It's fucking suicide!!! Wake up and smell reality. There's nothing wrong with being Muslim, (aside from racist mother fuckers thinking that "your kind" blew up the towers on 9/11 and thinking that Iran and Iraq all get along since they wear the same towels on their heads) the same way there's nothing wrong with being an Atheist. But try and get elected in this country with that being public knowledge. Fucking try. (oh, right, we have ONE person in Congress who is openly Muslim. Out of 500 or so slots. What amazing odds!!!)

You're either naive or stupid to think that calling Obama a "Muslim" wasn't some attempt to get people scared of him. It was basically the 21st Century way of saying, "Don't vote for that N*gger." My Nana lives in the Southern town of Joplin, Missouri and STILL tells me that the reason her neighbors aren't going to vote for Obama is because he's Muslim, and her response is, "So what if he is?!" to which I have to remind her, "But Nana, he's a Christian!" If you say something enough, people start to believe it.

Why do you think Obama is so qualified to be President? Obama himself said in 2004 he didn't think a run for the Presidency in 2008 was a good idea:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BnLozS-TnM

Oh, so now we get to start holding people to what they said four years ago? As long as the clip is available on youtube?! Good.

John McCain was for a "Respectful Campaign" before he was against it


John McCain was for "Privitizing Social Security" before he was against it


And Keith Olbermann nails him on so many different positions, I can't even list them all here


I think Obama was being honest in 2004 when he didn't want to instantly run for President and then saw the candidates the Democrats were offering and began to change his mind. And to be honest, I'm not against people changing their minds. This "flip-flop" bullshit is what you REPUBLICANS started throwing around. I think there's a difference in why Obama has changed his mind and why McCain changed his...and it's about pandering, not rethinking the situation. McCain USED to be a Maverick. Now he's "Bush The Third, with some change on the side!"

The Obama "attacks" seem to have been questioning his associations and trying to find out what the public record has shown who he is. The associations came to the front when everyone looked and saw there isn't much of a public record out there on him. Repeated efforts to access documents on his time in the state house were turned back because reporters were told no such records exist.

However, I've heard no one speculate whether his daughters are in fact his or not. I've heard no one question his ability to be President while having young children. I've heard few, if any, hard questions directed at Joe Biden and his record in the Senate.

This is my absolute favorite Republican talking point. This, "Let's play 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon with Obama and see who we can tie him to!!!" It makes the "He called Sarah Palin a pig...with lipstick!!!" controversy look valid. William Ayers! He totally tried to blow up the Capitol! When Obama was 8 years old! Then, 30 years later, Obama served on a council with him! Surely he has a time-traveling machine and is able to Quantum Leap that shit back to finish the score?!

Seriously? That's all you got?

Oh, what about Rev. Wright?! That crazy preacher who said crazy things!!! Unlike every other preacher, ever?! Listen, you want to start associating candidates to their church, let's take a look at Palin's...




And since you bring up Obama's daughters, let's pause for a second and imagine that they were older, and one of them got knocked up. You telling me that America and the Republicans wouldn't be using that and DESTROYING them throughout the entire campaign?! BULLSHIT!

Imagine this is a young black male, who knocked up the candidate's daughter...the election wouldn't even be close.


Look, it's getting late and I need to get up and go to work in the morning, but I just want to make one thing clear. Both sides are talking about CHANGE. Obama's been talking about it for 19 straight months, McCain latched on a few weeks ago. Your side is going to lose. You can't win by co-opting the message. Believe me, I know. I rooted for Gore in 2000 and Kerry in 2004. Both of them tried to appeal to the "middle" and co-opted the Republicans message. They fucking lost. (or had the election decided by the Supreme Court)

It might be close now, but in due time, once people get off the "Sarah Palin is MORE EXPERIENCED than Obama" high and start really thinking about it...realizing that just because the fuckers on TV repeat that line over and over and over again, doesn't make it true. They're going to wake up. They're going to see McCain is the one being negative. McCain and his dipshit of a VP pick are going to be the ones turning off the Independents. They've lied about their campaign rallies and the number of people attending, they've lied about her NOT accepting any Earmarks and being against the Bridge to Nowhere from the beginning. They've even lied about if Sarah Palin had been to Iraq or not. Even the AP is calling them out on this bullshit!

I mean, even today, as the stock market lost more shares than it has since 9/11, McCain is the one STILL telling the American people that "the fundamentals are strong!"

That's who you think is going to win this election?! Sorry, but I've seen the war-hero candidate who married a rich woman, changed his mind every other day, and constantly appeared out of touch to the American people before. He didn't win four years ago and he's not going to win this time.

(PS...Feel free to register and actually sign your name to a comment below...or just go back to posting on your MySpace blog, which gets SOOOOOOOOOOOO many comments, and act like I don't know exactly who you are.)